Carefully read the passage from “Dream Child; a Reverie,” paying special attention to descriptive details and sentence structure. Then, write an essay in which you analyze how Charles Lamb’s style contributes to his portrayal of his “dream children,” his grandmother, and his own childhood.
Original Thesis Statement
In Charles Lamb's Dream Children, his idea of his ideal children is created by the interuption of his long, detailed sentences and the reflection of his emotions into the actions of the children.
ARGUMENT/FOCUS
__no_ Does my thesis statement address
each part of the essay question?
_yes__ Is the point I'm making one that
would generate discussion and argument, or is it one
that
would leave people asking, “So what?"
Example: “Although
the escalation of violence in John Steinbeck’s Of Mice and Men eventually
results in two deaths, it is through violence that compassion is revealed when
George, in a violent but merciful act, saves Lenny from cruel mob justice.”
__yes_ Is my thesis too vague? Too
general? Should I focus on some more specific aspect of my
topic?
_yes__ Does my thesis deal directly
with the topic at hand, or is it a declaration of my personal
feelings
(“I think”/ “I feel” statements)?
LANGUAGE
LANGUAGE
_yes__ Does my thesis indicate the
direction of my argument? Does it suggest a structure for
my
paper?
__no_ Is the language in my thesis
vivid and clear? Have I structured my sentence so that the
important
information is in the main clause? Have I used subordinate clauses to
house
less important information? Have I used parallelism to show the relationship
between parts of my thesis? In
short, is this thesis the very best sentence that it can be?
yes___ Is the thesis statement written as a complex
sentence?Revised Thesis Statement
The imaginary children created in Charles Lamb's Dream Children are a reflection of himself, through their actions which break up his long detailed sentences, and portray his inner emotions towards the story of his grandmother.
I revised my thesis statement by specifying my argument and including every part of the question. Also, I clarified my argument so that it could be structured into an entire essay. It also creates a contradiction because it explains that he created the children in order to make sense of his own childhood.
